Trinajst. Za menoj je trinajsti potop. Pa saj ne gre za številko, ali pač?! Ne, da se razumemo. Nisem vraževerna. Nikoli nisem bila. Ampak včasih, ko se vse nekako čudno poklopi, se pač človek vpraša, koliko je dejansko na stvari. Na teh nesrečnih, po krivem obtoženih številkah. In po trinajstem ždim v kotu svojih misli. Zvita v klopčič se malce smilim sama sebi. Ker je preveč misli. Prehud tornado. Preveč žubori… Ker mi je ravno na trinajst šlo vse narobe. Oz. vsaj tako se mi je zdelo. Poglej me. Sem človek, ki ne prizna, da potrebuje pomoč. Še takrat ne, ko je zares hudo. Navajena sem reševati svoje situacije. Navajena sem biti samostojna. To mi je bilo vcepljeno v DNK menda. Od tiste smrklje naprej, ki se je obnašala kot fant, in so ji sošolci za obleko metali gosenice, sem vedno dvignila glavo in šla naprej. Brez, da bi od koga pričakovala, da mi bo podal roko, da se lažje poberem. In zato je v moji glavi taka zmešnjava. Vrtiljak dogajanj, vlakec smrti vseh možnih čustev. Novi Darji je po svoje všeč, da si drzne priznati, da potrebuje pomoč, tista mala deklica v fantovskih hlačah pa besni in vpije name […]
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Nekega dne, se je bog odločil, da mu je dovolj urejenega sveta. V kotlino je vrgel nekaj različnih kultur, ogromno strasti in goro arhitekturnih napak. In nastalo je Sarajevo. Mesto, ki diši prijazno. Toplo. Nenavadno. Diši po domačnosti. In žalosti. Diši po kavi. Tisti pravi, močni. Bosanski kavi. Diši po čebuli in mesnih jedeh. Po Bosanskem sahanu. In diši po presladkih kolačih z medom in zdrobljenimi orehi.    Sarajevo je mesto, ki ga ne gledaš, ampak čutiš. Čutiš ga v duši in v srcu. Zaboli te. In v nekem trenutku, ko se zazreš v otožen pogled prodajalca v eni od mnogih malih trgovinic na Baščaršiji, začutiš vso žalost preteklosti, brezup in hkrati izjemno voljo do življenja, ki jo premorejo le ljudje, ki so preživeli pekel ujeti v tej kotlini in hudiču pogledali naravnost v oči.  Počutiš se varno, a hkrati te je strah, da bi lahko v vsakem trenutku lahko izbruhnilo znova. In potem sedeš v enega izmed najbolj pristnih Sarajevskih lokalov. Tistega, ki ponuja sarajevsko kafo. Prinesejo ti jo v bakreni džezvi, na bakrenem pladenjčku. Z rahat lokumom, ki je občutno presladek in diši po vrtnicah. Kava je močna in črna, ko noč brez lune. In trpka, kot obžalovanje. […]
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Tisti dan sem sedela na tleh. Prislonjena na ogledalo v enem od baletnih studiev nacionalne operne hiše. Takrat, tisti trenutek, prav tistega sončnega popoldneva, se je po kotih dvorane plazila nekakšna otožna črna gmota žalosti. “Verjetno je kriva glasba,” sem pomislila. “Ali pa ponedeljek. Ponedeljki so krivi za vse tegobe sveta.”  Ne vem od kje se je prikradla ta otožnost. Ne vem, kako ji je uspelo, da mi zleze v vse pore telesa. Žalovala sem in preklinjala vesolje. Žalovala sem za nekom, ki ga v življenju nisem srečala in nisem spoznala. Preklinjala sem vesolje, ker mi ni dalo priložnosti, da bi ga spoznala. Verjetno strašansko egoistično razmišljanje, ampak želela sem si samo kapljico te izjemnosti, ki jo je premogel. Samo senco tega… Samo pičico.    Simfonija otožnih pesmi je žalostinka. Živi in diha nekaj tako zelo otožnega. Oddaja nekaj tako močnega in globokega, da se ti zdi, da te s svojimi ogromnimi, žalostnimi rokami zgrabi v pest in te zmečka. Zmečka vsak košček tvojega bita do neopisljive in neotipljive bolečine. Simfonija otožnih pesmi je tako zelo emocionalna, kot bi vanjo svoje žalovanje vdihnile vse duše tega sveta, ki so ostale same v svoji izgubi in bolečini.   Simfonija otožnih pesmi […]
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Nekaj čarobnega

16. 2. 2017
by darjin01
Orkester je čarobna tvorba. Kot ogromen organizem, sestavljen iz drobnih nevidnih nitk. Tisti, ki ste pogledali film Avatar, boste vedeli o čem govorim. O tistem drevesu, na katerega se povežejo vsa bitja planeta. Z drobnimi nitkami. In se začutijo.      Dirigent je drevo. Nekdo, ki razporedi energijo med maso instrumentov in ljudi. Nekdo, ki vzame kričanje violinam in ga preda čelom. Nekdo, ki ljubezen iz strun viol pošlje pihalom ali odvzame bes trobentam in ga položi na opne bobnov… Orkester je nekaj tako čudovitega, da se včasih težko ubesedi. Že, ko sem bila majhna, sem sanjala o tem, da bi nekoč bila del takega sestava. In ko sem hodila na operne in baletne predstave, so me ob prvih zvokih uverture, oblile solze. Zvok orkestra se mi je zdel tako čaroben, mogočen in lep, da vse te lepote duša preprosto ni prenesla…   In kasneje, ko sem že bila članica orkestra, se mi je še vedno zgodilo, da so me sredi igranja oblile solze. Da me je dušilo od vsega lepega. Od lepote glasbe, drhtenja strun pod prsti ali vibriranja lesenega ljubimca ob katerega sem se privijala. Tudi tokrat ni bilo nic drugače. Kljub temu, da sem v novo sezono […]
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DOCTOR ZHIVAGO

10. 11. 2016
by darjin01
Doctor Zhivago, one of the most beautiful and touching love stories in the world of art, is a famous novel by the Russian writer Boris Pasternak, for which he was awarded a Nobel Prize for Literature in 1958. In his outstandingly personal and philosophical story the author also contemplates on different aspects of system and the impact of the Revolution on humans and their social devaluation – the themes that were of course rather inconvenient for the authorities in the then Soviet Union. Therefore, in the face of great pressure put upon him, the writer had to renounce the prestigious prize.  After that his Doctor Zhivago remained rather unwonted at home, where the novel only re-established its true value after the social changes that occurred in the 1990’s. In the meantime, the novel became a huge success in the West, where it was translated into many languages. Particularly exposed in the novel’s renowned British-American film version, directed by David Lean in 1965, was an intimate story about the romance between Doctor Zhivago and Lara, which, after enthralling the audience and the film world alike (and receiving six Oscars and five Golden Globes), became a cult classic. Due to the fact […]
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SALOME

3. 11. 2016
by darjin01
Salome, Op. 54, is an opera in one act by Richard Strauss to a German libretto by the composer, based on Hedwig Lachmann’s German translation of the French play Salomé by Oscar Wilde. Strauss dedicated the opera to his friend Sir Edgar Speyer.  The opera is famous (at the time of its premiere, infamous) for its “Dance of the Seven Veils”. The final scene is frequently heard as a concert-piece for dramatic sopranos. The combination of the Christian biblical theme, the erotic and the murderous, which so attracted Wilde to the tale, shocked opera audiences from its first appearance. Some of the original performers were very reluctant to handle the material as written and the Salome, Marie Wittich, “refused to perform the ‘Dance of the Seven Veils'”, thus creating a situation where a dancer stood in for her. This precedent has been largely followed, one early notable exception being that of Aino Ackté, whom Strauss himself dubbed “the one and only Salome”. It was first performed at the Hofoper in Dresden on 9 December 1905, and within two years, it had been given in 50 other opera houses. Gustav Mahler could not gain the consent of the Vienna censor to have […]
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THE MARRIAGE OF FIGARO

2. 11. 2016
by darjin01
La folle journée ou le mariage de Figaro (1784) is an outstanding literary material, conceived by the master Pierre Augustin Caron de Beaumarchais (1732–1799), which was a genuine dynamite for the ruling regime of its time as well. Not only was Beaumarchais the first writer to become rich thanks to a successful literary work, but he also turned its theatre premiere into an extraordinarily memorable event, attracting large number of audiences. Figaro grew into a harbinger of the impending social changes, which later resulted in what was referred to as the French Revolution, so that eventually even Napoleon himself described this work as a »revolution in action«. At that time the performances, based on such literary materials, were strictly forbidden, although they were allowed to be published by the Emperor. This is how Lorenzo da Ponte (1749–1838), the librettist of the opera, composed by Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart (1756–1791), was granted a permission to its creation as long as it did not contain anything that could damage the reputation of the theatre, operating under the patronage of his Majesty. Luckily enough, Mozart, who had no political interests, was rather than by its related content note more attracted by its perfected story […]
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Othello

2. 11. 2016
by darjin01
Verdi was enraptured with the playwright William Shakespeare, whom he considered »an authority in the field of human heart«, from the earliest stages of his creating. He composed Macbeth, where he found himself trapped by his lack of composing experience, created a rather remarkable opera Falstaff and also dreamt of writing music for Hamlet and King Lear, which unfortunately remained undone. Sixteen years after Aida and the making of his Requiem, he and his librettist Boito conceived together one of the greatest masterpieces, considered by wild consensus of musical connoisseurs as one of the most beautiful operas of all times. The reform of the opera, thoroughly perfected by Wagner, deeply influenced Verdi as well, who was thus guided by its much needed refinement at the time, when he was working on Othello. Thus devised within the synergy between Shakespeare, Boito and Verdi was a typical music drama, which was already warmly acclaimed by the audience at its premiere on 5th February 1887. In comparison to Aida, Verdi’s art in Othello was even more profound and thrifty in the sense of the means he used, as well as more sophisticated and richer in its musical essence.   In the year when […]
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